Tuesday, November 29, 2005

The Future is Now...

...This just in!

US Air Force unveils hand-held laser gunBy Michael Sirak JDW Staff Reporter Washington, DC The US Air Force has unveiled its first hand-held laser weapon that gives security forces a non-lethal option for controlling crowds and protecting areas like checkpoints, according to service officials.

While only in prototype form and years away from fielding, the weapon, known as the Personnel Halting and Stimulation Response (PHaSR) system, holds great promise, they said.

The PHaSR is about the same size and weight of a fully loaded M60 machine gun - around 9 kg - but shoots a low-power beam of laser light instead of bullets. The light it generates is capable of temporarily impairing an individual's vision, much like the disorienting glare one sees when looking into the sun, said the officials.

Upon completion of testing, one prototype will be handed over to the Department of Defense's Joint Non-Lethal Weapons Directorate (JNLWD) and the second to the National Institute of Justice (NIJ): the law enforcement arm of the US Department of Justice. Both organisations support the programme, with the latter interested in its civil applications.

Captain Jean Luc Picard was unavailable for comment. We did call Spacefarmer, however. When he was informed of this, he suddenly wet his pants, climbed under the desk, and began rocking and giggling. We're pretty sure that means he's excited.

11 Comments:

At 12:46 PM, Blogger Dr. R. Murk said...

Star Trek lovin' hippie!

 
At 12:56 PM, Blogger Hobbs von Wackamole said...

hows yr glass house, Murk?

 
At 1:00 PM, Blogger Dr. R. Murk said...

How's your spelling, hippie?

 
At 1:02 PM, Blogger Hobbs von Wackamole said...

HA, i thought spelling corrections aren't allowed.
look, bitch, i don't believe in punctuation, unless i feel like it. i write hows, not how's. cuz i like it. and i write yr, not your, cuz i like it. and i write cuz, not because, cuz i like it. and i write fuck you, cuz i love you.

 
At 1:37 PM, Blogger Dr. R. Murk said...

Did I correct yr spelling?

Idiot...

 
At 1:48 PM, Blogger Hobbs von Wackamole said...

you can do better, murk.
at least, i thought you could.
now, i wonder

 
At 2:02 PM, Blogger Dr. R. Murk said...

You swine!

 
At 2:28 PM, Blogger Joey Polanski said...

Sirak was Spocks dad.

 
At 3:13 PM, Blogger Hobbs von Wackamole said...

and picard could kick kirk's ass

 
At 4:07 PM, Blogger Salbert said...

Ahhhh! Trekkies are taking over the world!!!!!! HI MOM! Wait is it on?

 
At 5:32 PM, Blogger Dr. R. Murk said...

Sal, please tell Hobbs that I was here first and he needs to give me my toy trains back...

 

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